HOT DOG MAN

World Cup Edition, 2006

Tom, I'm sorry.

For all the amazing memories which you have provided us with as Hot Dog Man at Virginia sporting events, my tribute appearance to the one and only Thomas Raymond Kuklinski was without a doubt the shining moment of the suit.

That's a kick in the balls, isn't it?

All day, I was posing for photographs, speaking into video cameras, and explaining the reason for why I would subject myself to a sauna-like experience all day, when hot dogs had no apparent connection to either soccer or the United States of America.

Soccer? Okay fine, there's absolutely zero connection to soccer. But the US-and-A? I mean, people, come on, you didn't think hot dogs were invented in GERMANY, did you? They can create the nuclear bomb, but they can't think of making the bun the same size as the frank.

Einstein, Schmeinstein.


"America! F*** yeah!"

same quote as above (Have you seen the movie?)

No description necessary.

Lord, this man is fat. Land of the free, home of the obesely brave!

When Elvis impersonators gush over how cool your costume is, you know you've picked a winner. Thanks, Tom, for making the rash decision while drunk one night to throw down on eBay for a $90 hot dog suit, plus $10 shipping and handling. Best hundo you ever spent.

Rey Mysterio, after George Bush's amnesty plan goes into effect.

Ordinary men are capable of cannibalism -- this shot proves the absurdity of objective morality.