WARNING: DEATH FOR DRUG TRAFFICKERS UNDER SINGAPORE LAW
That was the first thing I read on the customs form which I was groggily filling out at my body clock knows what time, the final minutes of the epic, 24-hour train journey + 12-hour flight from Belgrade to Singapore fading away.
Singapore is not the kind of place where you should be messing around with the po po. Lesli told me three stories, all of which she swears are true. In the first, she said it was a good thing that I recently cut my hair, because sometimes, if the passport controllers think it's too long, they will literally force the person trying to cross through to cut their hair on the spot.
No. 2 was even wilder: You need a doctor's prescription to purchase chewing gum, according to Lesli. Can't sell it, can't buy it. You can have it, but that's it. Next time, I'm smuggling in a kilo.
And finally, there is the rumor that if you try to cross the border with more than one pack of cigarettes -- that's all -- it is a $100 fine per extra cig that you have illegally smuggled across.
Hmmm, I know! Let's go get wasted, drive around until the sun comes up and then go knock over mailboxes!! SINGA-POOOOOOOOORE! Whew!
Singapore is not the kind of place where you should be messing around with the po po. Lesli told me three stories, all of which she swears are true. In the first, she said it was a good thing that I recently cut my hair, because sometimes, if the passport controllers think it's too long, they will literally force the person trying to cross through to cut their hair on the spot.
No. 2 was even wilder: You need a doctor's prescription to purchase chewing gum, according to Lesli. Can't sell it, can't buy it. You can have it, but that's it. Next time, I'm smuggling in a kilo.
And finally, there is the rumor that if you try to cross the border with more than one pack of cigarettes -- that's all -- it is a $100 fine per extra cig that you have illegally smuggled across.
Hmmm, I know! Let's go get wasted, drive around until the sun comes up and then go knock over mailboxes!! SINGA-POOOOOOOOORE! Whew!
This country has a lot in common with Serbia: Both nations' names start with the letter 'S," and both have lots of inhabitants of Indian origin. (Gypsies come from India, allegedly).
And I'm spent.
Singapore is the polar opposite of Serbia. This is a land of laws. Laws which were not made to be broken, as is their evolutionary purpose in the Balkans. It remains to be seen what will happen if I chew away on a busy street, but I'm envisioning a cane and not a lot of chances to consult with my attorney.
And I'm spent.
Singapore is the polar opposite of Serbia. This is a land of laws. Laws which were not made to be broken, as is their evolutionary purpose in the Balkans. It remains to be seen what will happen if I chew away on a busy street, but I'm envisioning a cane and not a lot of chances to consult with my attorney.
I haven't seen a place this clean since I left Switzerland.
They honestly fear the consequences of violating the law here. "No Poster Allowed"? It means no poster will be put up. Simple as that. "Better listen to the rules!" they say to themsleves. It is incredible.
In Sarajevo, people were smoking cigs in the stands of the Bosna club basketball game. In Serbia, according to Ana, over 75 percent of the citizenry smokes. In Singapore, all you need is a little piece of paper warning people to watch their backs, and it comes to a complete halt.
You know how every group of potheads has "the guy who gets paranoid?" That dude would never make it in Singapore.
No comments:
Post a Comment