My high school is ranked No. 1 in the state of Texas for basketball. Is yours?

Maybe you should go to espn.com and check. Oh wait, no, that story is just about Strake Jesuit College Preparatory, the most gangsta school in H-Town.

Thoughts:

1) Joey Brooks, the big man pictured in the article, who recently committed to playing at Notre Dame.

(cue the Notre Dame fight music)

He is the same age as my little sister Garland, a senior at the girls school next door, St. Agnes. Garland is also the captain of the Strake cheerleading team. Joey used to like Garland during their freshman year. She turned him down, stupidly.

"G" is for "Good God what a terrible mistake that was."

Don't blame me. I encouraged her to date him.

"Garland, you gotta LOCK THIS KID DOWN," I implored. "He is going to play in the NBA." I actually saw him play when he was just in eighth grade for St. Anne's, and he was nasty then, too. "Sure, if you marry someone who plays in the NBA, he'll probably cheat on you, which could lead to divorce, heartache and personal embarrassment. But as long as you don't sign a pre-nup, you're good; these things fade with time. Then you can go find love, blah blah blah, while BANK ROLLING."

"Bayless," she said, "No."

Selfishly, she refused. Now she and Joey are just "friends." They text one another.

G is for Good move, Garland. Joey will be starring at Notre Dame next year while you'll be dating some loser who is just going to graduate from college and look for a normal job.

My older sister Elizabeth lives in Corpus.

She enjoys cooking, talking about chips, going on college football and baseball trips, and punching.

Elizabeth used to get with Matt Albers, who was then in the Houston Astros minor league system, before making it to the big show.

$$$

He gave her one of his XXL MLB t-shirts, which she wore in front of me in Istanbul, the equivalent to a flashing neon sign saying that she dates a Major League Baseball player. Albers pitches for Baltimore now, and had a 3.49 ERA last season in 49 innings pitched. She, too, let the big fish off the hook.

What is wrong with my sisters? Have they no financial sense?


2) Strake's president and CEO Father Lahart, a close family friend, was quoted in the story in regards to whether or not Strake recruits:

"No one is assigned to us," he said. "The tuition is substantial. All of our aid is need-based, and there are no athletic scholarships. We look for excellent students who believe in our mission from across the Houston metropolitan area."

Right. As in, "We really have a need at the small forward position."