"If you need to cross the river," Bino told me, pointing out places on the map that I could scope out that afternoon in Prague, "don't go on the Charles Bridge. There are way too many tourists."

"I mean, there can't be that many," I said, my morning coffee in hand. "How bad could it really be?"

Bino just stared at me. "When you look at Prague on Google Earth, you can see the tourists on the thing."

I thought he was exaggerating. Then I saw for myself.

"I tried to cross the Charles Bridge once," he told me once I returned home, having confirmed with an eye witness account just how destructive a force mass tourism can be. "It took 30 minutes."

We couldn't compare times, because I had taken one look at the bridge formerly known as Charles (but which has recently been renamed "Overpopulation In a Nutshell Most") and veered to the left. I may be a tourist, but I am a self-loathing tourist. I can't beat 'em, but I still ain't joining 'em. Most Legit -- which doesn't have nearly the longevity as its next door neighbor to the north, yet remains a perfectly good way to cross the river -- was just fine by me.



MOST LEGIT! MOST LEGIT 2 QUIT! HEY! HEEEEYYY!


Break it down!


Once again, I ask the question: If a river isn't clean enough to swim in it, is it clean enough to eat fish out of it?



With all the popular fixation on mullets, I don't think rat tails have gotten a fair shake. This one was legendary.